On Working Out, or I Hate Skinny Biotches
So apparently doctors worldwide recommend that pregnant women workout 5 times a week. Which is fine. But then there's the matter of what is a "workout" for a pregnant gal: some say if you do anything more than walking, you're going to kill your baby. And then there's the other half who say if you change your workout routine just because your pregnant...you're going to kill your baby. So ever the moderate, I've decided to do some "easier" days while continuing to "train for my triathlon."
So I started doing group classes. This is very unlike me, because I hate having a workout buddy. Like seriously, it is the biggest fail every time. I have enough self drive and I'm good enough at guilting myself to push myself. Also, I really don't like working out with people. I usually end up fainting/passing out. For reals, just ask Cameron.
So for the most part, I really enjoy being friends with/surrounding myself with normal people. Normal people. Like women who are comfortable in their bodies, and can enjoy eating dessert. And talking about best practices and where to get a good deal on a steam cleaner. The problem with working out in a group class is that there are a BUNCH of skinny yatches who complain about their non-existant thigh meat, their huge butt etc etc etc. And then theres me, who has these crazy things called boobs, and curves everywhere else. I have no thigh gap.
Let me repeat that for the rest of the universe to hear....I HAVE NO THIGH GAP!!! And I really didn't care until a bunch of skinny biotches were complaining that their 2 inch thigh gap is not a 3 inch thigh gap.
And then there's the people who attempt to be "normal" by saying how much weight they've gained since having kids, and how they don't fit into their old skinny jeans, and the whole "i'm with ya sister! we're all big gals!" What I want to say is "cry me a mother flippin river! You no longer fit into your size 24! You cannot join the big gals club!" What I actually say is "..........." with my mouth agape.
On the other hand, the one group class that I do like is a spin class; it's in a dark room with loud music and no one talks to each other. It really is a beautiful thing.
So I may sound like a hypocrite since the entire first year of Joshua's life I was b-ing and moaning about how "fat" I was. Which is so annoying. I'm sorry universe. I'm a changed woman. I've also accepted the fact that people who are due a few months after me will DEFINITELY lose the weight before me. Its just a fact. And I have a beautiful range of jeans sizes for all of those post partum months ahead of me. We cope, we grow, we thrive.
So stop complaining about your body! I may be pregnant but I definitely have 10-15 lbs on you and I WILL take you down.
So I started doing group classes. This is very unlike me, because I hate having a workout buddy. Like seriously, it is the biggest fail every time. I have enough self drive and I'm good enough at guilting myself to push myself. Also, I really don't like working out with people. I usually end up fainting/passing out. For reals, just ask Cameron.
So for the most part, I really enjoy being friends with/surrounding myself with normal people. Normal people. Like women who are comfortable in their bodies, and can enjoy eating dessert. And talking about best practices and where to get a good deal on a steam cleaner. The problem with working out in a group class is that there are a BUNCH of skinny yatches who complain about their non-existant thigh meat, their huge butt etc etc etc. And then theres me, who has these crazy things called boobs, and curves everywhere else. I have no thigh gap.
Let me repeat that for the rest of the universe to hear....I HAVE NO THIGH GAP!!! And I really didn't care until a bunch of skinny biotches were complaining that their 2 inch thigh gap is not a 3 inch thigh gap.
And then there's the people who attempt to be "normal" by saying how much weight they've gained since having kids, and how they don't fit into their old skinny jeans, and the whole "i'm with ya sister! we're all big gals!" What I want to say is "cry me a mother flippin river! You no longer fit into your size 24! You cannot join the big gals club!" What I actually say is "..........." with my mouth agape.
On the other hand, the one group class that I do like is a spin class; it's in a dark room with loud music and no one talks to each other. It really is a beautiful thing.
So I may sound like a hypocrite since the entire first year of Joshua's life I was b-ing and moaning about how "fat" I was. Which is so annoying. I'm sorry universe. I'm a changed woman. I've also accepted the fact that people who are due a few months after me will DEFINITELY lose the weight before me. Its just a fact. And I have a beautiful range of jeans sizes for all of those post partum months ahead of me. We cope, we grow, we thrive.
So stop complaining about your body! I may be pregnant but I definitely have 10-15 lbs on you and I WILL take you down.
I love this on sooooo many levels. I work out 3 times a week but I'm over trying to loose weight cause it just makes me sad. I just need the endorphin's.
ReplyDeleteKate I've been losing the same fifteen pounds for almost twenty-five years now :D
ReplyDeleteThanks for reminding me ... I need to go run ... :D